How I've become me.

I really liked Last Samurai! One of the moments I loved was when Algren was in the middle of a tantrum about being held captive in the village. Katsumoto explains to him that the winter has the passes closed and reveals something brilliant: "Till then you are here..."

When my life takes a turn for the unexpected and unplanned I often throw a tantrum and ask that question, "What's wrong with me?" but rarely does anything good come out of it.

The better question to ask might come from that perspective, "Till then, I am here..."

Maybe in this season, while I remain in circumstances that I hadn't hoped for, I can ask:

What do I want to get out of this season?
Who do I want to become through this?

I've learned that we tend to become more like the things/ones we focus on. There is an incredible glory in the place where we currently are. Will I be aware of it or be too focused on myself and my circumstances to ever see it, much less ever be affected by it..?

Through this season of captivity (a bit dramatic but it's certainly how it feels) that goes now on 3 years, I can easily say that I know and love Jesus in ways I never have before; know and enjoy who I am in ways I never have before... But it took a season of "till then you are here" to become that man.

"A time will come when I will celebrate your rescue, but till then I will simply trust your nature." -Psalms 13